Holy Shit Kabittles...

So here we are, the end of the week, and the beginning of the ex. I think i'm going this year... but BIGGER NEWS...

I'm starting a new job. Still as a travel agent. but bigger and better, and i cant fucking wait.

I'm scared/nervous/pukey/excited/anxious/disturbed at how awesome this is going to be. I cant even wait. I want it to be July 1st NOW NOW NOW. NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW. NOW NOW NOW. omg. now.  I wont tell you where until its officially announced that I'm leaving my work. i've handed in my two weeks and everything, it just hasn't been made public knowledge. except when "hoochie" and i talk about it. lol.

Also, for those of you who see me in the peg, you may also notice I'm not wearing my engagement ring (which would normally NEVER leave my hand, and i feel naked with out it.) BUT we took it in to have the diamond that fell out fixed. P.S. WK CHAN ARE SUCH ASSHOLES. Don't make me feel bad about you guys being dirtbags. eff you assholes. Convo as follows.

Me/Sean: Hi. We'd like to get this ring fixed.
Lady: YOU NEED YOUR RECEEEEEEEEEEIIIIPT (RAWR RAWR!!)
Me: if we're paying for it?
Lady: No. let me see it. *looks at busted P.O.S cause their fucking ripoff jerks*... It'll cost you about 100.00
Sean: WHAT?!?!? The guy said it would be 60.00 2 weeks ago.
Lady: I don't believe you. who'd you talk to?
Me: that guy. the one over there *points*
Lady: Mr.JOE FUCKIN SCHMOE come here.
Guy: Yes?
Lady: they said you said you would fix it for 60.
Guy: who'd you talk to?!??
Lady: they said you.
Guy: *looks at ring* well.. i.... fine.
Lady: It'll be ready in a week. we will call you. give me your phone number now.
Sean: 888-3545 (not. dont call that number)
Lady: ok. *stares at us* What else do you want?
Me: a ticket, or receipt maybe so you dont rip us off again?
Lady: *shoves receipt at sean* maybe thank you would be appropriate.
me: bull shit. *storms out*

and CUT SCENE.
Moral of story: fuck you wk chan. you ripped us off once. never again.

two years today, and i feel like i cant breathe without you...

Have you ever been punched in the stomach, or gotten hit with a soccer ball in the stomach, where it winded you so bad that you thought it had COMPLETELY taken away your chances of survival/breathing? It seems overdramatic, but it hurts and you cant remember how to breathe at that very moment. Remember that feeling as a kid? I do. I fuckin hated it. I used to play soccer, and I CONSISTENTLY had that happen. bastards. thats what its like with you gone. i dont even know if your gone. you just dissapeared. dissapperated. disbanded. fuckin took off.

As mad as I am at you, I would give anything to see you and know you're ok. But i cant stop living. I have so much to live for. and so much to do. I just wish I could do it with a clear head.

I'm planning a wedding, I want to have waterballoon fights with my niece and nephew. (its too bad your birthdays are the same day, its really quite bittersweet.) My mums sick, Dev. bloody hell man, you left when things got so rough. I needed you. So much. But you needed me, and I let you go. I'm sorry.

When you get home can we start over? Please? <3

I miss you like crazy. And I miss playing earthworm jim. and I can't listen to SOAD without breaking down. and I can't hear alone or total eclipse of the heart without becoming a sobbing ball of shit.


But I think of our 6 packs, late nights, ridiculous laughter, last minute plans, long talks, getting mad and never staying mad, dancing because we felt like it, our king cans, long walks and/or drives, and karaoke memories... and i smile. I cry. I laugh. and I smile again. because you are my best friend. and I'll never forget you.

I miss you Dev, I wish you would come home... but sometimes, thats not in the stars. sometimes It is. either way, you do what you gotta... but let me know when its done.

<3

Devon I Miss you...

At approximately 4:00 p.m. on Saturday June 13, 2009 Devon Brock MOLDOWAN, age 25, left his apartment in Jasper and has not returned nor has he had any contact with family or friends.

MOLDOWAN's direction of travel and present location is not known. MOLDOWAN does not have a vehicle or bike and is believed to have left on foot.

A search of areas that MOLDOWAN would be likely to frequent have been met with negative results.

MOLDOWAN is described as:
- Caucasian male - 185 cm tall (6' 1")
- Average build - Long, wavy, reddish / brown hair
- Blue eyes

MOLDOWAN was last seen wearing baggy black pants that had patches stitched in yellow and orange stitching, a gray zip up hoody and black shoes.

Anyone with information regarding the whereabouts of Devon MOLDOWAN, is asked to please contact Jasper R.C.M.P. at 780-852-4421 or Crime Stoppers, toll free at 1-800-222-8477

OR your local RCMP

I wanna go fishing... something fierce

Soo.. I heard this coming weekend is free fishing weekend. which super means I don't have to purchase a mofuggin license to catch them lil bitches. I'm stoked. REALLY stoked. I like fishing. alot. shut up, stop making fun of me in your head. I know you are. Sean's never been fishing in his life, so it should be interesting as long as he doesnt impale me with his hook. that would suck. something fierce.

I went to pride yesterday, had a friggin blast, and got WAY too much sun. I was SOOO dehydrated that I even turned down beer. So not like me. anyways, I had a blast, and spent too much time with Drag Queens and drunk lesbians. But it was SOOO much fun. wow. so many inside jokes.

Seans back in town. I was SOO excited to see him. I missed him lots even though he was gone for maybe 5 days. I know, I'm a sissy. Getoverit. Either way, He bought me a pair of jeans, a pair of shorts (considering I haven't worn shorts in over 2 years, thats a ballsy move.), and a LADY GAGA T-SHIRT! ack ack ack. i was SOOO ecccited. Its born this way. with her face. i love it. i love him. and i love that he accepts my obsession with gaga. <3 LOVELoveLOVE...

Hopefully some big changes are coming my way....

Keep your fingers crossed boysngirls,

KaythnxBAIIIIIIIIII

Cake Pops Yum...

The other day, on my way to work with Diane. I introduced her to the best thing ever. on the face of the planet. sooo yum.

Cake Pops. They change lives. They're the best things since air. I love them.

Fucking Cake pops baby.

Now I want them. ALL. Yuuuum

My bags are packed, I'm ready to go, I'm standing here outside your door, I hate to wake you up to say good-bye...

Sean left this morning. *sadface* My bed is too big and lonely now. I miss him.

I know I know I know. He's only gone for 5 days. Well its my blog, and I wanna whine. so bite me.

Anyways, work is meh today. I'm so tired. I just want to sleep. So I may just do that when I get home. :)

I dont really have anything interesting to say, its more of a incoherent rambling today.

augh. tired. must sleep.

Boston Pizza, The Oak, Camp Arnes, and Gimli Yacht Club

The title makes sense.... Thats my long weekend. I can't even fucking wait. I've never been so gawdamned excited in my life. Except for when I knew Sean was going to propose. That was pretty exciting too. and when we were leaving for mexico. and when I went to Europe...

Ok. Sorry, I got lost in my thoughts. Anyways, Boston Pizza to meet with some of my lovely college ladies. The Oak as its a friends birthday, and I've never been, and it scares the Bejesus out of me. Meh, It should be good times.  Camp Arnes as we have a cadet function, and I'm totally looking forward to it. I get to spend my weekend on the Lake. Hell yes. I love boating. and fishing. and your darn tootin I'm bringing my fishing rod and some tackle. <3 This weekend is going to be ABSOLUTELY perfect. Minus my fiance. but he doesnt like fishing. so he can stuff it. <3 love you darling. :):):):):)

I think that myself, and some ladies from work should have a weekend getaway. It consists of wine, other assorted alcohol, fishing. <3 ladies?


I think thats the best Idea I've ever had.

Camping, Beer, Summer Sun, Backyard Fun

Well here I am. Posting again. Feels like its been a while. Meh.

Either way, Its Summer time and its fucking sunny out! I love it. I hate winter. Any of you who know me well, know that I want to slay the beast that is winter. (I feel like Gaston from Beauty and the Beast. Less Muscle, and arrogance. More Beer.)


...Interrupting for a brief moment.... I'm eating peanuts. and i just whipped one at my eye. then burst out laughing at myself. ahahahaha. nice. It's gonna be a good day.

...Oh and also, Second side note.... My blog= bad grammar, bad punctuation. Suck it up. ok? Thanks.

Anyways, back to winter and my massive amount of hate for it. I mean, I love how pretty the snow looks when it first falls. I dont like when it gets driven on and is heinous slushy ugly poo looking grossness. Yuck. It just grosses me out, makes me miserable, and then everyone else has to put up with my miserable self. Sorry Guys. Mother natures fault.

But summer on the other hand is WONDERFUL. It's sunny, theres flowers, its hot  hot hot. I love it. I've always said I should've been born in Jamaica. Not Flin Flon. **Disclaimer: I think Flin Flon Is A SHIT HOLE. Sorry Folks.***

Ok. Anyways. I love summer. And I'm changing topics... again.

GLEE TONIGHT!!! AAAAAAAAH!! It's the funeral episode. I am sooo sad to say this. But... ithinkitsbecky. I love becky. but I'll BAWL like when I fell off my bike and almost gave myself a terrible concussion. <3 Becky. :( I don't know for sure. But I've been reading every possible everything I can get my hands on regarding tonights episode... AND I WANT TO SEE IT NOW. It's supposed to be a really good episode.. but so terribly sad. I cant wait. Sean's mom is taping it for me. <3.

All I'm thinking about is glee. not the flight that I'm currently cancelling. OOPS. Nope, the airline isn't GleeAir. bahahaha. Oh well.


<3 Thanks for reading, Yo.

Bad Day

Do you every have those days where everything is really going ok, but theres just something bothering you in the back of your mind? and Its like one of those pesky flies?

Yeah, I know. Worst analogy ever. Get over it. My blog.

Either way, I'm  having such a hard time just living life and being the person I want most to be. I feel like I'm half the person I was since Devon left. I used to be so unafraid. We'd walk around back lanes with our case of beer, and didn't have a fear in the world. Now, I'm afraid to walk from the bus stop to work.

I still try to act like everything is ok. and that it doesnt bother me everyday, all day. But it does. How does somebody just up and dissappear like nothing else, and not look back? I miss my best friend. But I'm so choked.


Is it so hard to just be ok? Why does it still hurt like this was yesterday? My breath still gets caught in my chest when I think about  him and how it all happened. It's been almost two years, and I still cant figure out where to go from here.

Why doesn't he just come home?


Sorry... maybe my next post will be happier.